This Lecture is Taking Forever: A Villanelle
Best Couples Costumes for Halloween 2020!
I Tried Trump’s COVID Cocktail So You Don’t Have To
Exclusive Interview with Jefferson Davis
NEW CLUB ON CAMPUS: We write Rupi Kaur poetry about Penn
13 Puns for these Cursed Times
Op-Ed: Why Penn Students Don’t Need Breaks
Fall DIYs With Little to No Purchases!
Professor Shocks Students with New Tattoo
The Art of Seduction: Zoom Edition
5 Reasons Why Llamas are the Key to Reopening Penn
Locust Hate-Preacher Devastated Classes are Online
Wharton Students Feeling Right at Home with Virtual Recruiting
How to Best Utilize Zoom’s Greatest Feature
Guys, I’m Moving to Venus!
Why Online Classes are Just NOT IT
STORYTIME: Pete Buttigieg Haunted My Drive to Campus
Heartbreaking: Girl Staying Home for Fall Semester Thinks her Friendships will Survive the Distance
Fall 2020: A Shakespearean Tragedy
OP-ED: Abroad Did Not Change Me Enough
Top 5 Tips for Zoom Etiquette
What Did You Do This Summer?
Best 5 Minute Life Hack EVER
The “Tragedy” of Toad
Penn Partners with Ancestry.com for Mail-In COVID Tests
Quarantine Edition: Things to Roll on 4/20
“Yeah, I’ve Totally Been Prepping for Social Distancing my Whole Life!” Says Attention-Seeking Extrovert
Op-Ed: How I Got MERTed During Bio Lab
UPenn Announces New “Punch Bowl Only” Wing in Van Pelt Library
New Report Predicts Transportation Trends Coming To Campus
Op-Ed: I Sexually Identify as an “Atlantic Salmon”
The Five Stages of Post-Midterm Grief
7 Things to Do with Leftover V-Day Candy
How To: Enjoy Valentine’s Day ALONE
Psych Student Suffers Mental Breakdown Over First Midterm
Dear Straight White Male, Why Have You Forsaken Me?
Penn’s Super Bowl Commercials that Missed the Cut
OP-ED: Penn Kids Do Not Drink Enough
Super Bowl Ads Spawn Boycotts of 14 Different Companies
Top 10 Things I’ve Accomplished From The Toilet
The Story of How I Deleted My Entire Animation Project the Night Before It Was Due: A Poem
Frat Bro Avoids Coronavirus by only Drinking Natty Lite
Lost Penn Student Diary Has Readers Asking “You Doing Alright Buddy?”
Your Major Based on your Birth Month
SHOCKING! Marketing Major Watches Super Bowl for the Football
Call of Duty Players to be the First WWIII Draftees
Op-Ed: I Identify As A Cool Ranch Dorito
New Finals Season Study Strategy: Compartmentalization
