Top 10 Reasons You Should've Gone to Princeton

1. Free middle initial with every tuition payment.
2. Barbershop quartet is the preferred social unit.
3. Mascot is much less anthropormorphic.
4. Passed up your chance to meet a lot of interesting sweater vests.
5. Can dress either like a hipster, a prepster, or a scenester.
6. Ice Cube’s “You can do it” plays every time a hot chick walks into a room.
7. Veneral diseases cured with malaise.
8. Can’t pass up the chance to be taught by Russell Crowe and hope he asks you out to a picnic lunch.
9. Penn’s Bocci and Lawn Dart teams really not up to snuff.
10. Miss constantly reminding yourself you’re a rich white person.

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