Dark Mad Libs

by Kevin Kimura

Internal Report: Mad Libs, Incorporated

Re: Expansion of Product Line

Executive Summary: Mad Libs has dominated its sector of the games industry for over fifty years. However, our market has been restricted to the under-twelve age group. We believe that by tweaking our product and creating Mad Libs that appeal to older demographics, we can expand market share, providing our unique entertainment experience to older generations. We believe that the key to reaching older demographics is by applying the mad lib formula to templates with more adult thematic material. Please find attached some product prototypes.

Mad Libs: Obituaries Edition!

Our dear friend [name of person in the room] passed away yesterday [time of day] after a [adjective] battle with [body part] cancer. Preceding him in death was his beloved [relative]. We will always remember [name of person in the room] fondly for his [adjective] smile and [adjective] spirit. Donations may be made in his memory to his favorite charity, the Make-a-[noun] Foundation. A [adjective] service will be held at St. Mary’s [noun] on [date].

Mad Libs: Suicide Notes Edition!

If you are [verb ending in –ing] this note, then I am already [adjective]. Please tell [name of person in the room] that I [transitive verb] them and that I look forward to reuniting with them in [location]. I do not wish for anyone to [verb] themselves for my death; I simply feel that the world is [comparative adjective] place without me in it.

Mad Libs: Bigoted Rants Edition!

If you ask me, the problem with America is the [racial minority]. Stealing our [plural noun] and taking advantage of [adjective] services. Did you know that by the year [number], whites will be a minority in [state]? Did you know that [number] percent of [adjective] crime in this country is committed by those [pluaral racial slur]? Soon we’ll all have to learn [foreign language]. If you ask me, we should send them all back to [nation]. I’m all worked up now…pass me some of that [alcoholic beverage].

Mad Libs: Police Reports Edition!

Officer [name of person in the room] and I responded to reports of a domestic disturbance at [location]. Upon arrival, we observed [name of person in the room] engaged in an altercation with [name of another person in the room], who was intoxicated and brandishing a [noun]. We demanded that he [transitive verb] his weapon, but he refused to comply. To ensure the [noun] of everyone present, I discharged [number] shots at the suspect, killing him [adverb].


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