by Jonathan Weinblatt
Yep, there’s only a week and a day of class left so presumably you have some wild and crazy plans for winter break. Thanks to the beneficent scheduling office, the vacation is extra long this year. However, there’s still a really limited list of things you could do:
Seek Warmer Weather
Oh, you mean you’re traveling to wherever your grandparents from Jersey have a home in South Florida? No? You mean you actually live in Florida? And you left to come to Philadelphia for college? So you like to experience the changing of the seasons up north, but when it gets cold you scamper back down to the Sunshine State? Such backwards logic makes me wonder how some of you got into Penn in the first place.
Please, only losers actually go skiing in the winter. That’s so two years ago. All the cool kids nowadays go skiing in the summer, where you actually have to travel somewhere really remote to find snow or fake snow. I’ll admit, skiing is pretty fun, but I don’t know if I could make a whole vacation of it. After the first day, do you really want to bundle up again and go out into the cold weather so that you can glide quickly down a mountain about a thousand more times?
Backpack in Europe
You probably think you’re a real big shot. You do realize that graduation isn’t until May, right? I assume you figure that the dollar’s value is only going to keep dropping so you may not be able to afford that post-graduation trip. But if you’re worried about the money, then it probably doesn’t make sense to spend a gazillion dollars on a 5-star French hotel. Oh, and by the way, it doesn’t count as backpacking unless you bring a backpack and then hike with it on.
Undertake a Pilgrimage
Whether you’re traveling to Mecca or Salt Lake City, I hope you find spiritual fulfillment. But this is no longer the age of the camel driven caravan so what are you going to do with the next three weeks of vacation? Those two holy cities probably aren’t the best places to find a hip club or other crazy college students. Still, basketball fans can catch a Jazz game in Salt Lake City, and I do hear that the skiing in Mecca is bitchin’.
You couldn’t come up with anything to do so you’re going to sit on your ass at home and do nothing. You’ll probably wake up every day at 4 PM and relocate to the couch so that you can sit in front of the TV until mom calls you in for dinner. Then you’ll go online and talk to other people who are sitting at home vegetating. Maybe you’ll make plans for future jobs or fiddle around with your courses for next semester, but most likely you’ll be an eating/sleeping blob for the full three to four weeks. Actually, that doesn’t sound half bad.