Punch Bowl Investment Tips

by Walker Hawkins

In this time of a deepening economic crisis in both America and the rest of the world people are becoming more and more cautious of where to put their money. What is more, it is becoming quite apparent that the stock market may not be the best place to put your money at the moment. With this in mind, Punch Bowl has created a list of investment alternatives for today’s cautious investor.

1. Big, rubber-banded wad of cash you carry around in your pocket
2. Andrew Fastow’s personal bank account
3. A prince in Nigeria who just needs to borrow some money via non-traceable email
4. Beanie Babies (trust us, they’re making a comeback)
5. Any pyramid scheme you may happen across
6. A lit fireplace
7. Lehman Brothers (trust us, they’re making a comeback)
8. Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints’ Education Fund
9. FEMA
10. An envelope addressed as follows: Walker Hawkins, Trinity College Dublin, House 64.3.04, Dublin 2, Ireland (please!)

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s