Awkward Looking Man Now Working For Former Employer's Rival

On Monday of this week, a man described by several coworkers as being, “fairly awkward” and “lanky” went to his first day of work in several months. To the surprise of many, however, he was spotted working in the building of his former company’s rivals.

This whole story began more than a year ago when said employee was promoted to a higher position, while the former occupant of that position was moved to a position with separate but equal responsibilities. The awkward looking but amicable individual was then not given all of the resources with which he might succeed, and was demoted after only 7 months in his higher position. When he refused to return to his former position, the worker was then fired and given a severance package.

The unemployed man then grew a beard and began frequently using Twitter. During his period of joblessness, several politicians running for office used this man’s story as a way to illustrate the hardships of the current economy. “[Awkward man] was in a dire situation,” said California state representative Lionel Strong, “Wrongfully fired from his job, he could barely afford to pay for his health insurance and mortgage, as well his other 6 mortgages with the severance package he received.”

In an inspirational turn, the growing popularity of his Twitter account allowed him to find employment with the company where he is now working. In fact, a number of prominent economists point to the lanky guy’s ability to find a job as a bellwether for the rest of unemployed Americans. “Previously, we thought there wasn’t much of a market for the position he was ultimately hired to fill,” said noted economist Lauren Pasquarelli, “The economy had gone so far downhill that one company even hired a cheaper Mexican worker to fill a job normally done by Americans.”

Asked about the man’s recent employment, a surprisingly large number of people seemed to be supportive of him, and feel that he is already doing excellent work despite the fact that they don’t know him personally. “It’s good to have [tall redheaded man] back at work. I really missed watching him every night. He can really make me laugh,” said local fireman Chuck Wright said, which the author of this article thought was just creepy.

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