The Voice in My Head

10:00am – What a beautiful morning! Too bad I have that Latin test in an hour. Oh well, time to get up and start the day.

10:15am – “It’s been one week since you looked at me, cocked the table aside and said I’m angry!”

10:42am – “Three days since the living room. I never thought a way to make it if I tell you. If a day, you’ve forgiven me, it’ll still be two days till I say I’m sorry!”

11:00am – Alright, I spent all day yesterday studying for this test, you’re ready for this Sam! You can do this!

11:02am – Marius hostes in bella silvam inter fluminemque vicit.

11:04am – Pugnatus sum meliores aves chickity China, the Chinese chicken, have a drumstick and your brain starts tickin’.

12:48pm – “Five days since you laughed at me, said you got the room on both of my knees it’s been”…wait…I only have 2 minutes left?! No! I studied so hard for this. Dammit!

1:42pm – “Chickity China, the Chinese Chicken, have a drumstick and your brain starts tickin’.

2:10pm – “It’s been One Week since you looked at me!”

2:16pm – With all of these engineers bumping into each other on Locust Walk, you’d think it’d motivate them to invent a teleportation device even faster.

2:28pm – What a waste of paper. Nobody’s gonna go see your dance show anyway.

2:42pm – And that’s how I’ll invent teleportation! It’s perfect. Don’t tell anyone about this, Sam. They all want to steal your idea.

3:04pm – You want me to watch your backpack and laptop while you go to the bathroom, random dude from 2 chairs away? Sure, I’ll watch it like a hawk – a hawk that doesn’t care about your backpack and laptop.

3:08pm – I wonder if I could train a hawk to watch my backpack and laptop.

3:11pm – What would the hawk get in return? Would I have to watch its eggs or something?

3:13pm – Idea: train a hawk to carry around a backpack, because then when it puts the bag down the hawk will be forced to ask a human to watch it, then it will owe that human one bag-watching in return. It’s brilliant.  I’m brilliant.

3:15pm – Oh man, it’s her! Play it cool Sam, she’s walking over to you, just play it cool. Have a nice normal conversation.

3:17pm – “Checkacheckacheckachecka like vanilla it’s the finest of the flavors. Then you’re show a go go go a go go go and then duh duh roto go like to sign a waiver!” No! Not now! I can’t pay attention to what she’s saying!

3:20pm – Ugh that was so embarrassing. How did you screw that one up, Sam? Oh well, hopefully you’ll be able to impress her when the whole group goes out to dinner tonight.

3:30pm – Oh, Drumline’s on TV. I’ll get some work done after this one scene.

4:30pm – Why would you tell Dr. Lee he can’t read music, DL from Heroes? You know you can’t win the BET Classic without him!

5:30pm – What a great movie. Morris Brown’s got nothin on you, Atlanta A&T!

6:00pm – I have just enough shampoo for this shower. I should buy some more tonight.

6:04pm – IT’S BEEN ONE WEEK SINCE YOU LOOKED AT ME! DROPPED YOUR EYES TO THE FACE TO SAY YOU’RE CRAZY!

6:08pm – CHICKITY CHINA, THE CHINESE CHICKEN, YOU HAVE A DRUMSTICK AND YOU’RE BRAIN STARTS TICKIN’.

6:40pm – Why can’t we just cab it down? I really don’t want to take SEPTA. I’m still afraid of SEPTA alligators, but I can’t tell them that.

6:50pm – Well they might give me a bit of a hard time, but I’m glad I took a cab down by myself. You know what they say: better safe than attacked by mutant alligators.

7:00pm – There’s karaoke at this restaurant? Hmm, maybe I should sing something.

7:45pm – She keeps talking about how much she loves the Barenaked Ladies. None of our friends understand, but I certainly do.

8:17pm – This is it! She just asked if anyone wants to sing a Barenaked Ladies song with her! Now all I have to do…wait…what was the name of that song…the one with the chicken and the…AH DAMMIT SAM! C’MON, WHAT’S THE NAME OF THAT SONG?

10:43pm – This night couldn’t have gone any worse. Don’t cry Sam, just hold yourself together.

12:45am – “Chickity China, the Chinese chicken, have a drumstick and your brain starts tickin’.”

10:00am – What a nightmare yesterday was. Well, at least it’s over and I can start dedicating my thoughts to more important things.

10:02am – “Hey now, you’re an all star! Getcha game on, get paid! Hey now, you’re a rockstar, get a show on, get played! All that glitters is gooooooold!”

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