“Little” Pissed She Must Find Out Who Her “Big” Is

Earlier today freshman Claudia Powers was seen sulking through the Quad, actively upset that “Big/Little Week” is coming to an end. “My big, I’m sure she’s great and all, and I’d really like to meet her, but I just don’t want all of the free shit to come to an end.”

As standard, Powers’ big has arranged deliveries of gifts, trinkets, and sorority garb, as well as nightly readings of bedtime stories or erotic fan fiction. As if the deliveries were not enough, the anonymous big chartered a private helicopter to take her “littlest” to and from DRL daily. Last Wednesday Powers uploaded to Instagram an aerial view of the Love statue with the caption “I wish every week was Big/Little Week #luvmybig.” However, Powers’ favorite experience has been the nightly line-by-line reenactments of House of Cards season two by nude Freshman boys.

The big has gone on record, confirming how excited she is to have a new member in “the lin”; however, she is a little disappointed that her little is valuing these gifts and experiences more than actually meeting her.

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