New Job Opportunity: World’s Vaguest Start-Up

Locations:
 San Francisco, CA
 Los Angeles, CA
 New York, NY
 Washington, D.C.
 + local and international positions available

Position: Unpaid internship for the summer. Sometimes we pay. If we like you, we’ll pay you. If we like your skills, we’ll hire you, probably. Our full-timers tend to be more attractive than actually skilled, so I wouldn’t call this job a sure bet.

Job description: Piramides Industries is looking for bright, young talented college students to do some sort of internship thing. We are a business and technology start-up based in San Francisco. Our members are all over the place right now, but I’m like 80% sure you’ll be working in a San Francisco office building. At least, we hope that the building is finished by June or May. You know what, don’t worry about it, you’ll be living in San Francisco. Or at least a suburb.

Our start-up combines business and technology to make money. I think our mission statement says some bullshit about the “greater good,” but that’s just so we feel better about ourselves. Plus, we have really awesome t-shirts. Our founder did Penn Apps one year and had enough capital to place a bulk order of CustomInk t-shirts for her crew and her hallmates. At that point, she was in too deep.  She basically said “fuck it, let’s make a start-up” and here we are.

Oh right, the job description. We’ll probably have you fetch us coffee. And then we’ll have you research where the best coffee places in the city are. And then when we’re up working late doing shit, we’ll ask for this awesome coffee and the coffee place will probably be closed and you’ll get our rage for it. But after, we’ll probably bond.

You’ll probably also film us 24/7. Making the next social network isn’t as important to us as starring in the next Social Network. Like, have you seen that shit? What says Oscar nomination better than “home footage” of the real people spending late nights coding. Or investing. Or whatever it is the fuck that we do.

 

If interested:

Please send a cover letter and resume to jan@piramidestech.net. While you’re at it, send us your Facebook profile (public profiles only, please) and your favorite Vine.

 

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