You Can Pay Me Money To Live In A Shithole While The Pope Is In Town

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Host Contact Information

My phone is broken so just direct them to my facebook (I changed my last name to “Vagina” though because I don’t want grad schools to be able to track me down).

 

Description

Wanderlust Paradise

It’s pope weekend, and the living is easy. This room exudes a casual, “I don’t even know how cat food would get there” vibe. What it lacks in a top sheet, it makes up in a willingness to wash the fitted sheet if you want. If you hate being alone, you’re in luck because you will get to live with twenty teenagers. The youthful exuberance alone is enough of a draw to this prime real estate on frat row. I don’t think it’s that far from where the Pope will be, but I actually have no idea.

 

The Space

Room type: Private room

Bed type: I couldn’t lift it onto the frame, but it has a box spring and a mattress so who really cares.

Property type: Frat house.

Bedrooms: 1.

Bathrooms: I think we just unclogged one of the stalls. BYO Toilet Paper.

Beds: 1.

Check in: Anytime really. I’ll be here though.

Check out: When the pope leaves.

 

Amenities

I left some toilet paper for you.

Coffee pot and hot plate in room.

Internet if you have a Penn I.D.

Cat.

Dirty clothes basket + tide pod (you need your own quarters though).

There might be AC. I don’t know. Leave the window open. It gets rid of the cat smell anyway.

Condoms.

There’s a couple beers in my fridge; they’re yours.

 

Prices

Extra people: Go wild.

Monthly price: Prison rules.

Cancellation: I doubt I’ll even know you’re coming.

 

Safety Features

I took down the smoke detector so enjoy that.

If there is a fire, and you throw my blanket over it to put it out, I won’t be mad.

Advil might be in the top draw.

Bandaids are on the shelf, but I need them because I bought new Docs so please don’t reach a place where you need them.

If you haven’t already drank the beers, try using them to sterilize wounds.

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