Arnolf Bentham

About: Arnolf Bentham

Biographical: Richard ‘Toothy’ Bookerton was born in 1954 beneath the overpass near Exit 47-A on I-95. Raised on garbage and hard knocks, Bookerton learned from an early age that if he was going to get anywhere in life, it would be through “git’n money from hav’n folks thinks that I be not what I am’s” .

Toothy began grifting in the early 60s, taking such personas as a child prodigy at piano, the illegitimate son of Jeopardy host Art Fleming, and a can of tuna. In 1974 he convinced the public that he was the manager of the Philadelphia Phillies and led them to 3rd place in the National League East (Mike Schmidt would later acknowledge that most of his fielding expertise came from Bookerton’s instruction). In the 1980s and 90s he spent time on his biggest project ever by conning his way to Vice President of the United States under the pseudonym ‘Dan Quayle’.

Today, Bookerton is currently passing off as a student at the University of Pennsylvania under the names such as ‘Arnolf Bentham’ and ‘Jonah T. Mysterious’. It is known that he frequently contributes to the Punch Bowl Humor Magazine.

The author has 30 post(s):

 Fan Fiction: The Art of Reworking Classics for the Entertainment of One on 11/07/2012, stored in Articles

 Our Love on 16/04/2012, stored in Articles

 Last Will and Testament: The Truth on 06/03/2012, stored in Articles

 Field Trip on 21/02/2012, stored in Articles

 The Life and Times of Ingar Brevich on 24/01/2012, stored in Articles

 Innovation Fail on 06/12/2011, stored in Articles

 All Aboard the Love Train on 07/11/2011, stored in Articles

 Randolphe III on 10/10/2011, stored in Articles

 The Global Financial Crisis on 26/09/2011, stored in Articles

 Advanced Question Dodging on 30/08/2011, stored in Articles

 A Letter from the University of Pennsylvania Research and Thesis Review Board on 25/04/2011, stored in Articles

 The Prosecution Rests on 18/04/2011, stored in Articles

 MERT Daily Log on 04/04/2011, stored in Articles

 Welcome to the Marriott! on 21/03/2011, stored in Articles

 Midterm Grades Now Posted on 04/03/2011, stored in Articles

 A Letter To My Darling Wife on 21/02/2011, stored in Articles

 Amish Country Jams! on 07/02/2011, stored in Articles

 Made this a bit ago on 18/01/2011, stored in Articles&Images

 NAMBLA Ode to Justin Bieber on 27/12/2010, stored in Articles

 The Adventures of Legacy Man and Affirmative Action Girl!!!!! on 13/12/2010, stored in Articles

 Yeezy Protests on 06/12/2010, stored in Articles&Images

 What My Essay Really Says on 21/11/2010, stored in Articles

 In Case the Mayor of Chicago Thing Doesn’t Work Out on 08/11/2010, stored in Articles&Images

 A Scary Halloween Tale…… on 25/10/2010, stored in Articles

 Welcome to Sansom Place! on 11/10/2010, stored in Articles

 So Suddenly It’s Cool to Have Leonardo DiCaprio Show Up in Your Dreams? on 05/09/2010, stored in Articles

 Google vs China Censorship War! on 18/04/2010, stored in Images

 Let’s Cut the Bullshit: An Oscar Preview by Arnold Bentham on 12/03/2010, stored in Articles

 No Gold on 20/02/2010, stored in Images

 Ancient Greek Life on 15/12/2009, stored in Articles

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