February 3, 2021 Punchy

How to BS in recitation when you didn’t do the readings

November 24, 2020 Punchy

Ranking College Houses (Based on Their Ability to Get You Laid, Pre-COVID)

September 23, 2020September 23, 2020 Punchy

5 Reasons Why Llamas are the Key to Reopening Penn

April 20, 2020April 20, 2020 Punchy

Quarantine Edition: Things to Roll on 4/20

February 19, 2020 Punchy

Op-Ed: I Sexually Identify as an “Atlantic Salmon”

February 18, 2020 Punchy

The Five Stages of Post-Midterm Grief

September 13, 2019 Punchy

MADLIBS: Back when I was a freshman…

March 26, 2019 Punchy

How to Summon Your Roommate

October 30, 2018 Punchy

BREAKING: New College House Dedicated to Kanye, Now Called “College House West”

April 18, 2018April 18, 2018 Punchy

Student discovers he signed up to host 24 Baby Quakers while blacked out at Fling

September 25, 2017July 20, 2019 Punchy

10 Things Not to Say to Your Roommate on Move-In Day

December 22, 2015March 27, 2016 Punchy

Campus Masochists Bemoan End of Finals Week

December 1, 2015March 22, 2016 Punchy

Sedona Jameson | I Refuse to be Silenced

November 23, 2015January 29, 2016 Punchy

NO, I DON’T WANT TO GO TO YOUR COLLEGE

April 24, 2015December 23, 2015 Punchy

Exposé: Penn Heroin Club

February 8, 2014February 14, 2014 Punchy

Penn Community Waiting for Snow Day

October 15, 2012October 19, 2012 Arnolf Bentham

Record Levels of Wimpiness Found in College Freshmen